What I Want From The Next Batman Movie

Written By: Rachel Grubb

It's inevitable that it's going to happen--the third Batman movie. And since I don't know any more about contracts, negotiations, or what's going on in Nolan's head than anyone else, I'm going to tell you what I feel would make the next Batman movie a comic fan's dream.

First of all, Nolan needs to direct the entire franchise and never let anybody else take it over and run it into the ground. I remember when Batman '89 came out. It was suddenly fashionable to wear Batman t-shirts, and comic book geeks like me actually got to be cool for a change! Then they made another movie. Then another. And then another. Batman became uncool, again. In fact, it was probably less cool than it was before Tim Burton.

Christopher Nolan might not want to direct Batman for the rest of his life. But, Chris, we need you. You're the only one who gets the comic book world exactly right. Comic book artists use a very realistic drawing style that mimics the real world. Now movies already look more like the real world than drawings ever could. But for some reason, when directors try to adapt a comic, they often stylize it so that it looks less 'real' and more 'like a comic'. Nolan makes it real, and makes you believe that characters like Batman and the Joker could really exist. Nolan gets it right.

Secondly, bring back the Joker. I'm not of the opinion that it would be disrespectful to recast him after Heath Ledger's passing. Let me start by explaining why his Joker is so amazing to me. When I used to read the comics, watch the cartoons, etc., I could imagine Gotham City--like actually walking through it--and everyone there as if it were part of the real world. But not the Joker. Not only that, I couldn't imagine Jack Nicholson or Cesar Romero in the Gotham that I knew. They just didn't represent the Joker of the comic. When I saw The Dark Knight, I finally got to see the Joker. Heath Ledger was able to make him real for me. I think it would be a great tribute to him to keep his reimagining of the Joker alive. As a character, the Joker belongs in Batman's world, and he should stay there for the next movie.

Of course, then there is the matter of who is going to play the Joker, now that Heath is not around to reprise the role. My suggestion is this guy. Now I know you don't know his name. And I believe at this point, not even his biggest fans know his name. But since people think it's impossible to recast the Joker, and they're taking a chance anyway, their best bet would be to take a chance on an unknown actor. He's got the right look, he's talented, and he's been rehearsing for the role since Dark Knight came out, so can we please give it to him already?

Having said that, I think the Joker should be a minor villain in the next movie, perhaps like the Scarecrow was in The Dark Knight. He should be in Arkham, which would lead to the introduction of Harley Quinn. That's who I really want to see in the next Batman movie, because she would fit in perfectly with the Gotham that Nolan has created.

Which brings me to my next point: stick to the lesser-known villains. For those of you not all that familiar with the Batman franchise, it's obvious who the "lesser known villains" are--the ones you haven't heard of. For all you geeky-ass fan boys and fan girls, "lesser-known villains" usually refers to the villains that originated in the comics, but were not featured on the '60s TV show. If you're a big Batman fan, of course you think, "Shit, everybody knows who Clayface is!" But they don't. They know who the Penguin is, though, and it's probably not because of the animated series. So, yeah. That means: no Penguin, no Catwoman, no Riddler. The Joker was the exception. The Joker is in nearly every incarnation of Batman, because, as we all know, one can't exist without the other. With the lesser-known villains, fans can see characters brought to life that they've always wanted to see, but never had the opportunity. Everyone else will be able to view them with fresh eyes, and without any preconceived notions of what they believe the characters are supposed to be.

And on the subject of the Riddler, can I just say that the Riddler has a real name, and it's not Coleman Reese? I'd like to nip that IMDB rumor in the bud right now. Apparently, some are speculating that Coleman Reese, the pudgy accountant who nearly "outed" Bruce Wayne, is going to become the Riddler in the next movie. Apparently, he has a knack for "solving puzzles," because he figured out who Batman was. Um, okay. He found the the designs for the Batmobile in with some old files at Wayne Enterprises. It didn't really take too much deductive power to solve that one. And what's more, the Riddler should not know who Batman is. At least not right away. It's possible that this is what Nolan had intended, just as it's possible that he had intented for Natasha, the Russian ballerina, to become Catwoman. She has about as much in common with Catwoman as Reese has with the Riddler. But that would be really dumb.

Catwoman is one of my favorite characters. The problem is, I like her so much that I would never be satisfied with any actress they chose to play her, or any version of her they would choose to portray. Angelina Jolie or Megan Fox? Puh-lease! The only way I'd like to see Selina Kyle in the next Batman movie would be if she was Hooker Selina, like in Frank Miller's Batman: Year One. She's tough, angry, jaded, damaged and so far outside of most people's vision of Catwoman, that I know I will never see her in a movie. So I would rather not see Catwoman at all.

Last, but not least, the next movie needs to be Rated R. All the classics, The Killing Joke, Arkham Asylum: A Serious House On A Serious Earth, and the new Joker graphic novel. Those are all hard R fare. I get it that little kids like Batman, but what about me? I'm an adult, and I like Batman, too. This time, I'd like to see a movie for people like me.