What People Want To See In Star Wars Episode VII ... Jar Jar Killed ... Incest?

From The Daily Telegraph

SO Disney bought up Star Wars and J.J. Abrams is going to make Episode VII.

Ordinarily, that might be a 50/50 split that could go either way. In this context though, things can only go up. Episodes I-III were coarse and rough and irritating and somehow got everywhere, not wholly unlike a substance such as sand. We have no doubt J.J. will make everything soft and smooth again, like he did with Star Trek. While our faith in him is justified, we do have some small and humble requests and we know he reads the site, so.

No.10 Jar-Jar Binks is killed instantly

The opening scene should be a marvelous throwback to the who-shot-first Han vs. Greedo? sit-off of yore. In the dead corner, Jar-Jar Binks. In the other, who cares? Just so long as they are a callous murderer and don’t just shoot this thing, but go the extra step and pluck those ears from his head and make them into a balloon tauntaun. Jar-Jar would then collapse to the floor bleeding profusely from his head-stumps and in incredible agony, tongue lolling out of his mouth and eyes rolling back, not even a statistic anybody ever remembers. This movie is going to rule.

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Catch up on the latest Star Wars: Episode VII News - MIN's Star Wars Episode 7 Page



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